It Wasn't Just a Game

 

I was nervous but I felt -- no, I knew -- I was the right person for the job today.

I had to call the Brunswick hockey game against Millbrook. That's not meant to be obnoxious.

None of this is.

Yes, the Hartong Rink was where St. Luke's defenseman Teddy Balkind was last Thursday when he had an on-ice collision and, ultimately, lost his life.

As the week went on, I thought about if Brunswick would want me to call any games. Nothing is assumed.

They did, though there were two games to choose from: hockey or basketball against St. Luke's.

After some talk, we decided on hockey. I wanted whatever would make people smile and relax. 

That's what a broadcaster does. They try to be a conduit. They try to relay information and stories and, overall, stay out of the way.

So if that's what I can bring to fans, then that's what I'll do.

I had prepared myself to walk back into the rink and, honestly, wanted to pay my respects first. But a funny thing happened. The rink was buzzing when I walked in. Players were practicing and playing mini-games.

It was glorious.

The media -- a small portion -- descended upon the rink as their editors wanted content. Good people, those who were there (Pete Paguaga and Michael Fornabaio of Game Time CT). I'm proud to call them friends.

The whole atmosphere prepared us for whatever "normal" is supposed to feel like.

Still, there was an eerie feeling to the rink, as Dave Fierro and I both said.

I opened the broadcast on Local Live and Robcasting a bit earlier than normal, to set the scene and allow the audience to be present for the moment of silence to honor Teddy.

I don't rehearse stuff. You know that. I'm like Jackie Gleason in that way. I try to stay in the moment and react. Still, I couldn't help but think that the eyes of the hockey world were on Brunswick and St. Luke's last week. I worked that into the opening, as I alternated between remembering Teddy and those impacted while still recognizing there was a game to be played.

We paused.

Sticks pointed to the heavens.

Heads bowed.

Then the puck was dropped.

I'll tell you honestly that I had to catch myself a few times. 

"Don't choke up, Rob," I thought. "Definitely DO NOT cry."

I simply stopped talking if I felt that happening and it happened a few times.

I ran to the gym to keep an eye on basketball -- St. Luke's won -- as I feel a responsibility to report all of this.

That's just it. I felt a responsibility to relay the sites and sounds as much as I've ever felt. I felt like everything had to be said with more care. Choose the words with caution. Respect the schools and the athletes. Respect Teddy's memory. Respect his family. 

You never know who is watching or listening.

I wanted to be a voice of comfort. Even humor, like when I nearly dropped my clipboard off the balcony while the game was going on.

I laughed. I hope viewers did also.

At times I was amped. At times, I felt exhausted.

Brunswick won the hockey game 5-3.

I sat in the car for probably 20 minutes after I packed up because I just needed to decompress. That's what I do. I immerse myself in the broadcast.

Teddy -- his spirit, his presence -- was as much a part of the game as anything. Brunswick and Millbrook played was passion and class as everyone tries to move forward. Eventually, it became "just hockey."

But, really, it wasn't.

Not yet.

Whether it was Bruins' coach Mike Kennedy or rink manager Oscar Miranda or the fans or players or trainers or me, we had an angel looking in on the action.

The Bruins play Hill on Friday on the road then come back to Hartong to play Hill on Saturday.

I'll be there.