Tuesday, July 21, 2020

Tired



It's a little after 10 p.m. as I begin typing.

I try to stay up until at least 11 and wouldn't call myself either a morning person or a night person.

And, inevitably, I wake up somewhere during the night.

I used to sleep like a rock but that's just not true anymore. I might be asleep by 11:15 tonight but someone will text or message me.

Maybe I'll sleep through that but you better believe I'll wake up for other reasons.

Then it will begin. Toss. Turn. Look at my phone. Play a game.

Read.

In rare moments, the TV gets turned on.

These days I literally never have a full nights sleep.

It's a couple of hours...wake up...maybe go back to sleep...and so on.

There might be a few stolen minutes here and there on the couch or in bed or in my car (in a parking lot, of course).

You'd think I would grab the computer and write but for whatever reason that's rare.

What keeps me up? What doesn't? Stress, money, life, health.

In recent days, if it wasn't worrying about my car situation, it was about the cat or lack of work or my taxes or something else.

But it's always something.

I used to let nothing bother me in those spots but those days are long gone.

In a past life, I'd go fall on a couch.

In this life, it's my bed or bust. So, I'd change where I sleep -- putting my head a the other end or switching sides.

I've tried adding melatonin to the routine. It moderately helps.

I'm tired.

Sleep well, world.

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