OK, I'll Do It

 

Speaking in London, Apr 2022. I even have international relations down!
(Chris Hunt photo)

I've seen too many posts regarding the election of the speaker of the House.

All from two accounts: one on Twitter and one on Facebook.

Yup. Trolls. And we don't feed them, right?

So, after much consideration, talking with The Cat, and prayer, I've decided that I'm the right person for the job.

Look, I speak. I speak professionally. 

I host a radio show and broadcast a whole lot of events.

I've been a public speaker, beginning in elementary school, so I'd say that's a pretty long time.

I delivered a speech about the history of the Yankees when I was in 8th grade. I was president of my sixth-grade class a few times! I don't recall, but I think the term was a week or a month.

Look at all of those conferences that I moderate for Hunt Scanlon! How about standing in front of the Greenwich Old Timers Awards Dinner? If I can handle those rooms then I can be the speaker of the House!

I mean, I've got this.

I'll come up with answers when this blog or my social media accounts are investigated. 

It was humor. That's what I'll tell them.

Memes. That's all. Isn't that what everyone posts?

(For the record, I don't post many memes)

Oh, I'm sure people on both sides of the aisle will find reasons to be bothered by me, and isn't that how it should be?

In that regard, I will be a unifying force! Everyone will hate me! I'll bring everyone together!

But, honestly, what scandal could there possibly be?

I've lived a fairly clean life. At least I think so. I'm sure a few things can be created about me.

Richard Nixon had Checkers the Dog. Get ready for Rascal the Cat!

This is such an easy fix to a mess of a situation in Washington that I think it's a no-brainer.

I mean, what is there to this gig? I stand up, I make the House be quiet and I speak. Easy peasy, no?

Maybe I can ad-lib a few jokes or relay a few scores. Otherwise, just give me a script and I'll take it from there.

This will stop the tweets. The memes. The obsession.

America will be the winner!

So, friends, Mr. Smith once went to Washington in a movie.

It's time for Mr. Adams to go to Washington and speak.

Or I'll bring speakers with me. I have a couple here from my stereo.

Start the process. I'll take the job.