Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Time To Move Along (or Off The Bench)

Back to reality, I suppose.

So A-Rod, what have you been up to lately? I'm guessing from the chorus of "boos" that you haven't been coming through in the clutch lately.

Wait...what do you mean he hit a game-winning grand slam last Saturday?

I'm sorry that My Mets won't be going 173-0, after dropping a couple in Atlanta. Still 171-2 is possible, right?

Hank Aaron has announced that he will not be playing any role in celebrating Barry Bonds passing his home run record this season. Good for him. We need more people like the Hammer.

No, not MC Hammer.

I love the NHL, but they really don't use their heads in the league office. Why would they schedule the Rangers, Islanders, and Devils to all play game one of their respective playoff series on the same night? It would be good for metro New Yorkers to be able to see these games. Oh well.

Guess the Knicks can save the "Welcome to the playoffs" speech for another season.

And hope those ping pong balls don't go well for them, because the Eddie Curry trade might then look legendarily bad.

As opposed to really bad.

Glad we all know who the father of Anna Nicole's baby is now. I'm sleeping better as a result.

After gathering all of the evidence, I've decided that Pacman Jonesis a man I want to party with.

Speaking of which, how about the Duke lacrosse players getting cleared? The prosecutor dropped all the charges.

While we wage war on this country on tedious subjects, let's get back to the world at home, with this headline that I just read: "Iran may be helping Iraqis build bombs."

Puts things back into some sort of normalcy, no?

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