It's Not What You Want (#INWYW)

Aaron Judge will provide plenty of thrills in 2018. (TROY TAORMINA/USA TODAY SPORTS)

I could have written this post in 1976.

Or 1980.

Or 1981.

I certainly could have written it in 1995.

Yes, 1997 also, as well as 2001 (ugh), 2002, 2003, 2004 (let's not talk about it), 2005, 2006, 2007, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2015...

and now.

That's just the Yankees' history (in my lifetime) of playoff losses, flameouts, and heartbreaks. We could talk about other teams, but this will do.

There were limited expectations for the "rebuilding" Baby Bombers. Maybe they'd win 85 games. They'd contend for the Wild Card, but fade. They wouldn't go to within one game of the World Series.

Sports hurts. This hurts.

The other day, I was asked if I would be content to see the Yankees make it to Game 7 of the ALCS. Would I be able to absorb it if they lost to the Houston Astros?

I knew the answer. The answer was confirmed moments ago.

No.

We put our souls into sports. We live and die with the teams that we choose. Oh I don't mean the team that looked sort of cool so let's see how they do in the World Series and forget they ever existed the next year.

I mean the team you fall for and never leave. The one who leaves you in tears. They one whose gear you wear and cards you collect.

No, I'm not fine with the Yankees losing in Game 7, as if it's all good since there were no expectations for the 2017 Bombers.

I'm not "just happy to get there."

I'm the type of fan who prefers to be blown out. Down big early in Game 7 in 2004, the stress was reduced. Down 4-0 in the middle innings tonight, I chatted with friends online.

Yet with the final out, ugh. Just ugh.

We don't play for the team. We don't earn the money. In fact, we pay it.

Yet it still hurts.

This team thrilled us. Aaron Judge will likely come in second for the MVP, but will run away with the Rookie the Year. Anyone remember when Andrew Benintendi was going to win ROY? That was cute, wasn't it?

The Yankees went to Game 7 of the American League Championship Series. They were one of the final four standing in baseball.

But despite that moral victory garbage, the truth is it was still five wins short of the mission.

That's what we've been taught since the first time we glanced at the pinstripes. Making it isn't enough.

Winning it all is the goal. To be honest, I feel that way about each of the teams I root for.

I'm not the type of fan who felt good that the Rangers made it to the Stanley Cup Finals in 2014. No -- I wanted the Cup. The two Steelers Super Bowl losses (both of which I expected)? Bad.

I can't even deal with the Knicks.

So while I was prepared to deal with a Yankees loss tonight (and predicted it), I still found myself fairly glum when it was all over.

Sports will do that to us. It will hurt like a punch to the gut, and we'll question why we do this to ourselves, and sometimes even wish that our teams don't make the playoffs (it's just easier, though not realistic).

Then the eternal optimism takes over on Opening Day.

But tonight? No.

It stinks.

Yankees fans know heartbreak. Of all of the losses listed above, 1995 and 2001 (OK, and '04) stand head and shoulders above the rest.

Sleep will be lost.

And life will go on.

For the record, I will watch the World Series. I've seen them all since 1975 (some more, some less). I always watch. I'm a sports reporter and a sports fan.

I'll watch.

(Note on the title: Joe Girardi says "It's not what you want" a lot. This loss isn't his fault. He's a wonderful manager.)