Saturday, March 07, 2020

A Silly Hard Goodbye


The game had been over for some time and the rink was mostly empty.

The scoreboard was left on, as if a bad reminder was necessary, and wouldn't be turned off until I left.

VISITOR 5. WICK 2.

The season was over.

And yet, for whatever reason, I just couldn't leave.

I go through this a lot. I've highlighted it before. Be it the adrenaline that's gone or whatever the case, I struggle to leave many games, often forcing myself to do so.

But, that last game of a season? It's tougher.

My brain tells me to soak it in...just in case...

So there I was. I Facetimed with great niece Isabelle from North Carolina.

I packed up the equipment.

I archived the audio.

I took pictures.

I just looked around.

The reality is that the season is just a small portion of a year, and that I wouldn't be back in the Hartong Rink until most likely December at the earliest. But, given how fleeting all of this is, it can also be over just as easily.

There's no contract. No guarantee. Sort of a gentleman's agreement of "Oh, sure. You'll be back."

So I took it all in.

Then I made myself leave, but not without making a promise to myself.


I went to the baseball field, to serve as a reminder that I would be right back.

You see, I've always liked Brunswick, but was never sure what they felt in return. Again, while it's fleeting, there has been warm regards passed from class to class as I've built this relationship dating back to the fall of 2016. But, really, I've called Brunswick games from the very start at WGCH. It's just that, overall, nobody knew it.

So, at this point, I just want to be where I'm wanted. Some places make me feel that way. Greenwich football does, for sure. The rest? Nah. An occasional note from basketball. But otherwise, it just...well. I don't know.

Mahopac baseball? Yes. I thought Mahopac football also, but it didn't pan out. I was hoping for Mahopac basketball (girls? boys? Doesn't matter) also. Again, not yet. Mahopac softball is interested and I like that.

Trumbull has been kind.

There have been glimpses from Fairfield Prep, but that's mostly due to Eric Scholl (Mets fan) and Eric Woosh (Browns fan, but I forgive them both), and assistant hoops coach Garrett Hickey. Fairfield, as a town, has certainly shown love, but...

Every now and then, another school tantalizes.

Or it's Section 1 (New York) taking me. Then...not.

Or I'm "The Voice of the FCIAC." Then, I'm not.

But Brunswick has remained largely true across football, basketball, baseball, ice hockey, lacrosse, and now even water polo.

When you run in circles as I often do, you just want a home. Brunswick has come awfully close over the past four seasons.

Yet, here I remain: a free agent and it's scary (yes, the Renegades from Jun until early Sep). I feel like I'm constantly fighting for my very life as I watch others get gigs because they buy them or they're free or whatever. It's scary and I feel like I have to defend myself constatnly.

Sometimes, I'm just Brooks Hatlen, wandering the streets of Portland aimlessly in The Shawshank Redemption.

Or I just care too much about sports broadcasting.

I'll call lacrosse next Friday from the confines of the Local Live studios.

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